Rain Gauge
I got to thinking the other day about myself. I thought about how I used to be a nice guy. I really was. I even think other people considered me a nice guy. I didn't start fights, didn't push envelopes... I just let things go. At some point, I became an asshole... funny how that happens. I can't really pin it down to the one moment it happened, but I do know that it obviously happened. I used to be nice, now I'm not, so there had to be a turning point. Any of your morons need a diagram?
Was it one event at the turning point though? I doubt that. I would have remembered that. It had to be an accumulation over time, and therefore could have been set off with the slightest additional event, therefore going undetected as the catalyst of my transformation. If you look at pictures as I grew up, I'm smiling so brightly at a very young age, only to quickly and methodically look angrier with each year.
I think it goes something like this: Everyone has a rain gauge (figuratively... not literally... if I don't add that, some idiot will say "Not me, sure don't, duh huh!"). Everyone's gauge is a different size. When the world and everyone in it pisses all over you, it begins to fill up. When it gets full, you hit critical mass and have to overflow that piss onto others by being an asshole.
Of course, some people medicate instead. This burns a hole in their rain gauge so it can't easily fill up, but everyone around them still gets wet anyway due to the leak. The medicating type seems to position themselves right under the stream though, eventually causing the gauge to fill faster than it can leak, leading to the inevitable overflow. Everyone still gets wet. What a pity.
Finally, there's the people that have rain caps on their rain gauges. They are perpetually joyful, having never caught any piss, instead letting the rain cap splatter it about so there is more to be caught by everyone else. This is why you hate the goody two-shoes. You can't pin any wrong doing on them, but you, as a justified heel, know you just want to slam that white-meat babyface through a table, hopefully hard enough to break off the rain cap.
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Big Cray: Accept No Substitute
